Biography

My name is ♥CHERYLL(: I am attending SSIS(: with all my besties. :D I like music, designing and shopping. My most random act was to sit myself on the floor of S2 Pearl and laugh like xiao, also to laugh without sound at all. :DD I press the dislike button for insects, blood, blackouts and expensive clothes. && unmanicured fingers.:P this is about it. (: nth else. here's my blog; XD

Mediabox

"If we live our life in fear,
I'll wait a thousand years
Just to see you smile again "

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Sweetdesires

Did I hear someone said "cheese" or "chocolate"?

new notebook
new lipgloss
silky top
brush guards
kabuki brush
light denim jeans

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Sunday, December 12, 2010

The reason why i wanted to post again is that i need to vent this out.
I'm sick and tired of keeping this to myself and have everyone think im a cold heartless bitch.

Imagine if someone important to you thought you were a monster in disguise, a person constantly wearing a mask, only to reveal its oneself when no one is there to see it.

This friend of mine thought that way about me too.

And now, I think that there is some parts about me that I haven't disclosed, that this friend of mine hasn't seen.

on my messenger, for those of you who know me, I have recently said that "Sin: is what everyone does, but not everyone can see it." When someone is mad at you for a reason you are not clear of and in the midst of anger, this certain someone is refusing to let you know. In my personal situation, this friend of mine is aware of something I did wrong, but won't tell me exactly why. Now, looking back to what I've said to this friend, what I've did to this friend, even what I've talked to people about this friend, I feel that I see when I've done, to this friend and myself.

For this particular friend of mine, a lot of blissful memories are permanently stuck in my mind. And a lot of hurt that I have once did to this friend as well.

Somethings are better left unsaid, but I think I should in this case.

I have ever mentioned that I hate it when this friend is around, that the fun stops when this friend is in the picture. I've said that I can't stand it sometimes, and that I wish this friend would just go away. Though I've never said it to this friend's face, I'm sure this person is already aware of it and it is what made this friend see to a whole new side of me, or at least that what this friend thinks. But behind all this negative things that I've said, I'm actually trying to cover something that I want to forget, something that happened between us. Because I don't want to do the same thing and give hope and hurt again, that's why I chose to say all these things about this friend of mine.

I want my words to cover what I feel inside.

But then, this friend found out tonight.

For this friend of mine:
I know sorry doesn't mean anything, and that in your eyes you might think I'm a heartless monster behind a mask of everything that is fake. but I want to say that I don't mean anything I said, and that please understand that I want so badly for things to be covered up, in result I've neglected your feelings. I hope that I can take back what I've said and that you ARE one of the closest friends that has been through a lot with, and for me. But if this post is not what you are looking for, then all I can do now is say I'm sorry.

I'm sorry to this friend of mine.

I guess, I have found what I did wrong, and that you are entitled to make me feel bad or in this case, something you can't seem to forgive me about.

Sorry.

♥CHERYLL